![]() ![]() ![]() And I’m still exactly where I was, but with a slightly nicer chair, so looks like I won, hunter-duckers! Ten years on, and the Xbox has had to sheepishly remove its Kinect like a hat at a funeral, the PlayStation Move is relegated to backup Christmas-themed sex toys, and the Wii itself is consigned forever to the leaky trough of consumer history, with all its brown gunk-encrusted controllers and cheaply-made third-party hidden object games about Toy Story cast after it. Remember the Nintendo Wii? After the Nintendo GameCube was the console equivalent of a Chinese gymnast - well-crafted and colorfully-dressed, but painfully undernourished - remember how Nintendo followed it up with something that resembled a UFO cult's purity-testing device, and it sold better than mouthwash outside a blowjob factory, and everyone was all like, "Ooh, motion controls are the future of gaming!", and I was all like, "No, they've only attracted a short-term crowd of gimmick-loving trend-followers, and ultimately, the long-term core audience of gaming plays to relax and unwind and not Morris dance around the fucking living room.", and then the consoles were all like, "Don't listen to Grumpy-Trousers! Motion controls all 'round!" This week on Zero Punctuation, Yahtzee reviews Miitopia. ![]()
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